Whether it’s your first time or your 100th time playing fantasy football, a cast of characters takes shape in every league, and in no better place is this cast revealed than during a draft. And it helps to know these archetypes ahead of your time on the clock, so you know what to expect.
Consider this your crash course.
Speaking of crash courses, if you need one in fantasy in general, make sure you get your school supplies and head over to Fantasy U (I tried to teach a course on fantasy personalities and fantasy team names, but they told me I still owed credits from my last semester at Fantasy U, so … yeah).
Anyway, the following personalities are never at their truest selves more than during drafts, and we here at Yahoo Fantasy have taken years of extremely serious, completely factual research to highlight each of them in detail for you.
Not sure which personality your league-mates fit into? Not sure which YOU are? Don’t worry — we’ve got you covered. You might even discover you take on a combination of these personalities during a draft.
Without further ado, behold: the key personalities of every fantasy league.
THE EXPERT
The Expert is the most common of the personalities you will find at a fantasy football draft. A veteran of multiple leagues, The Expert is well-versed in statistics, player performance/trends/histories, as well as various fantasy formats.
One would be forgiven for thinking The Expert is an actual fantasy analyst.
The problem, of course, is that The Expert’s tireless thirst for knowledge hasn’t exactly translated into fantasy championship success — a fact his/her league mates constantly remind him/her of. Renee Miller explains this phenomenon more in her excellent piece on draft biases.
Year after year, The Expert drafts a balanced, contending team, he/she makes great pickups off the waiver wire and makes informed start/sit decisions … only to lose by the slimmest of margins in the playoffs — or miss them entirely, due to some freakish, unexpected, miraculous occurrence.
But hey, keep your head up, Expert — maybe this is your year.
Quotes you might hear from The Expert at a draft:
Average fantasy finish: Third place with injury luck, sixth place with bad injury luck.
THE OLD HEAD
Don’t let the name fool you — The Old Head doesn’t mean that this person is of advanced age. They do prefer the old-school ways of doing things, however. The Old Head might arrive at the draft party armed with a pen and pad or a crumbled-up piece of looseleaf with a bunch of barely-legible pencil markings. The Old Head might make (more than one) mention of how they used to do things “back in their day.” He/She might name-drop random, obscure players from yesteryear.
With that said, he/she might come off as out-of-touch and maybe a tad arrogant, but please understand: The Old Head has played in COUNTLESS fantasy leagues. They know their stuff, even if their tactics might come off as outdated.
Quotes you might hear from The Old Head at a draft:
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“Y’all wasn’t there.”
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“Someone didn’t do their research.”
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“Nah, I don’t need the WiFi.”
Average fantasy finish: Ninth place.
THE ROOKIE
No fantasy draft would be complete without The Rookie. This individual might be completely new to fantasy football and currently enrolling in Fantasy U, or maybe just has a season or two under their belt. They might be a big football fan, or maybe they just want to join their friends in a fun game. Whatever the reason, The Rookie is still getting used to the ins-and-outs of fantasy.
So don’t be so quick to judge when they select Patrick Mahomes first overall in a non-Superflex, one-QB league.
Quotes you might hear from The Rookie at a draft:
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“Damn, do you always have to wait so long for your next pick?”
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“I need to do more research on defense and kicker.”
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“Do you think Christian McCaffrey will be there at pick 9?”
Average fantasy finish: For some yet-undiscovered reason, either third place or last place.
A relatively new personality compared to some of the staples on this list, The Social Media “Influencer” (also known as The TikToker) is armed with a phone and a lot of ideas.
(Note: “Influencer” is in quotes, as this person can actually be a professional influencer, and aspiring one or … just someone who’s really, really active on social media.)
You have to be on your toes around The Social Media “Influencer,” as the speed at which they might capture a moment in the draft or in-season and post it on their profiles is remarkable. They’ll get footage of the first reach of the draft, they’ll create posts of their victories and their bad beats and don’t even get me started on the campaign they’ll unleash if they win the entire thing.
Quotes you might hear from The Social Media “Influencer” at a draft:
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“Wait, don’t start the clock yet, let me take a pic of the draft board.”
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“Ooohhh, you’re about to go viral.”
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“#ChipSZN”
Average fantasy finish: Seventh — and they will post a video explaining why they ended up there.
THE PARTY ANIMAL
The second most common personality at a fantasy football draft, the Party Animal is exactly what he/she sounds like: a party animal. The main caveat is that The Party Animal ALWAYS wants to have a live draft, and they ALWAYS suggest a bar or their own backyard. The Party Animal might bring friends to the draft who aren’t even in the league. He/She might ask everyone what they’re drinking right before the draft starts. He/She might suggest music be played in the background. The Party Animal might unleash cheers or jeers after every pick is made, and will only get louder as the draft moves along.
This might all sound like negative qualities, but The Party Animal is an integral part of a fantasy football league. They keep things light and are a living, breathing reminder that this is a game about a game and you should have fun playing it.
Unfortunately, after all those beverages and hilarious outbursts, you can imagine how their team looks when it’s all said and done.
Quotes you might hear from The Party Animal at a draft:
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“Why aren’t you drinking?”
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“Whoever makes the first reach has to take a shot!”
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“WHOOOO!!!” followed closely by “LET’S GOOOOO!!!”
Average fantasy finish: Anywhere between eighth and last place.
THE TROLL
Every fantasy football league has one — even if he/she hasn’t presented him/herself yet. The Troll, like the Party Animal, is an avid fantasy gamer, but eventually, they get taken over by their incessant need for a little chaos — for their own entertainment, of course. The Troll might have a permanent smirk on his/her face on draft day. They might proclaim themselves the winners of the draft before it’s even started. He/She might make a snarky remark after certain picks are made, and will not hesitate to call out picks that he/she deems incorrect.
The Troll might start drafting the backup RBs others were eyeing to pair with the star they had already taken — just because they’re there. If a quarterback is selected before him/her, The Troll might then draft that quarterback’s favorite target.
You can’t help but laugh, though — The Troll is blessed with an excellent sense of humor. In the spirit of competitiveness, The Troll often has multiple rivals in the league, and hey, what’s fantasy football without a little trash talk?
Quotes you might hear from The Troll at a draft:
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“Are you winning this week?”
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“Some of y’all need to reevaluate your fantasy careers.”
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“I don’t even know why you guys are still drafting — do you see my team?!”
Average fantasy finish: Somehow, to the disdain of everyone else in the league, between first and fifth.
THE HOMER
They can’t help it, really. Even when they try to smother their fanhood, it finds a way out at some point, every single time. Yes, The Homer has an egregious, obvious weakness — they can’t help but draft a player (or two) from their real-life favorite NFL team.
Yes, they are also likely a Bears/Packers/Cowboys fan, too.
The Homer likely arrives at the draft decked out in their teams’ gear, and their subconscious goal is to create a QB/WR stack from that team. But while it is somewhat of a weakness, The Homer does something (whether inadvertently or not) that few other personalities do: they create a deep personal stake in their fantasy team that makes the game exponentially even more fun than it already is.
Quotes you might hear from The Homer at a draft:
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“Patrick Mahomes, who? Give me Caleb Williams!“
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“YES! LET’S GO, GOT MY STACK!”
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“I don’t care if I already have five RBs, I watch this guy all the time, he’s going off.”
Average fantasy finish: A perennial middle finish, between fifth and eighth place.
THE LEGEND
Mysterious. Enigma. We come to him/her at last: The Legend. It seems like every fantasy league has one. The Legend barely speaks during the season — unless spoken to, that is. He/She barely makes an appearance in person — he/she might just FaceTime or Skype their picks during the draft.
But if they do make it to the draft party, however, don’t be surprised when their random eighth-round pick causes audible “Oooh”s and “Ahhh”s throughout the room.
No one knows much about The Legend — some in the league may even doubt his/her existence, but make no mistake: The Legend exists, and he/she is a dominant fantasy gamer with plenty of trophies under their belt.
You won’t hear them talk about those wins though. You might not even hear The Legend at all — until it’s too late.
Quotes you might hear from The Legend at a draft:
Average fantasy finish: First or — on extremely rare occasions — second place.
Source Agencies
