Summer is speeding by, and we’re already halfway through August! Even though we have some time until the end of the month, there have already been plenty of great jokes on Twitter. So here are some of the best tweets from this month so far:
And follow the accounts that made you laugh so your Twitter timeline will be even better!
1.
oh you like nyc? name every rat
— erica (@ericanextdooor) August 5, 2024
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4.
[hard launching her]: yes it’s true. We’re in cahoots
— bort (@tacobort) August 6, 2024
5.
I did brat summer in 2022 and spent two years healing from that kind of behavior
— tim (@deliclit) August 6, 2024
6.
being 24 is fun because you make friends and you have no idea they’re 32
— danaka says free palestine 🇵🇸 (@wifeoftoast) August 6, 2024
7.
mom can you pick me up? i took a consulting job and now i’m at top golf cincinnati.
— maxim (@maxim_516) August 7, 2024
8.
(first day as a pilot) the what pit
— Charlie James (@malecowgirl) August 8, 2024
9.
Dating app for people with no rizz called Fumble
— tweet davidson 🍞 (@andykreed) August 8, 2024
10.
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @ANiMaListicAN
11.
when an ugly man follows u on ig it feels like ur being chased in the woods
— conejita 🐇 (@plsmeowtome) August 9, 2024
12.
flirting by saying thank you so much instead of thank you
— michaels (@FilledwithPiss) August 13, 2024
13.
the dentist’s assistant gon ask me if i have a gf…. girl ik u see these bruises in the back of my throat
— AMIIR (@_amirnyc) August 13, 2024
14.
Disney / Twitter: @hashjenni
15.
I need to get laid so bad but I don’t want to
— aubrey (@aubviouslynot) August 14, 2024
16.
Does anybody know why he did that to me . No worries if not
— لا حولَ (@Idgafwarvet) August 15, 2024
17.
My friend got shot so i brought him a crossword puzzle to the hospital he said “thank you but do it look like i wanna do a fucking crossword puzzle?” Like oh ok fuck i thought 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
— NOEL. (@ninaanoell) August 1, 2024
18.
PBS / Twitter: @awaitingtrial
19.
after i do my lil peace sign + head tilt combo, get that camera out my face fr😭😂
— I M A N I (@prettygirll4L) August 2, 2024
20.
Ik a toilet hate to see me coming 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
— PUNKIN🕷️ (@fineasspunkin) August 1, 2024
21.
“born a man” “born a woman” sir i was born a child. a baby, even
— 🐸🖤 𒁹pallas 🖤🐸 (@amazonmilkfrog) August 2, 2024
22.
i know that block button hate to see me coming.
— SLIM (@_slimarella_) August 2, 2024
23.
being 25 is crazy i’m paying bills and fees i’ve never even heard of before
— TEEK (@yeahytk) August 4, 2024
24.
I still wanna know why the Popeyes chicken sandwich made yall act like that
— party gets me wetter☆ (@mainbitchclique) August 7, 2024
25.
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @hashjenni
26.
Disney / Twitter: @Kamogelo_MN
27.
STX Entertainment / Twitter: @vveetto
28.
just realized paying with apple pay and using face ID is kinda like using face card
— av (@clairobeatty) August 10, 2024
29.
demure demure demure do mure job applications
— xavier (@nahimdifferent) August 12, 2024
30.
bouncing on it in a way that establishes character development and furthers the plot
— michael (@FilledwithUrine) August 12, 2024
31.
“You dodged a bullet” ok and maybe I wanted to get shot. Ever consider that
— لا حولَ (@Idgafwarvet) August 13, 2024
32.
Going to pilates is fun but it’s also like who are all these women
— em (@cbcradio2) August 12, 2024
33.
Cartoon Network / Twitter: @KaniRosi
34.
Harpo Productions / Twitter: @iceihy
35.
I’ve been doing this new challenge called Doing Bad August. It’s where you’re doing bad in the month of August
— little green (@btwnrevolutions) August 9, 2024
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